FOMO, clubbing and the loss of yearning.

I was having a very casual conversation with my roommate some other night and we were conversing about how things have been normalised(that shouldn't be normalised) in the society we live in and how crazy it is .I hate being judgemental so in no case am I being judgemental in this article, it's just thoughts that I have being having regularly.

Alot has been going on in the society and people are doing things that might have become a norm to them but to others they are quite crazy.I agree that people should do whatever they feel like doing and not get criticised by what other people have to say about it.I tend to think that some people have taken this phrase a little too far and again I'm not here to criticise anyone or anything.

Fear of missing out is what troubles most people me being included.I sometimes do feel like I have to have fun and do what other people are doing,like clubbing, so as not to feel left out.Clubbing is all fun with the right people but it reaches a time and I'm like is this how I really want to be spending my Friday and weekends,you know, just having drinks and alcohol and flirting with boys who later on get mad at you for interacting with other gents because they kinda liked you that night or do I want to do something purposeful with my life and endulge in art.

Personally I am quite an introverted person so I always see it as a win when I go out with my friends on Fridays for drinks coz i get to interact with different people and the one justification that comes to mind is that atleast I am not missing out.So different people do different stuff due to the fear of missing out and these stuff are sometimes normalised alot.The root cause of this normalization can be the use of social media.Social media has created a facade on what's cool and what's not.Its always about cool people do this and if you do some other stuff then you aren't cool which is so crazy coz people will always follow these stereotypes and not know who the real you is.

The one thing that we thought was really normalised is sex.Sex is really sacred and seeing people normalise it is so scary.The concept of sex now is just for fun and to enjoy.When people meet for the first date or a not planned meeting in let's say a club,they tend to have sex that night.Like how do you have sex with a stranger whom you know nothing of.Sex involves switching energies between the people involved and just having casual sex with someone you met for the first time is not safe.The other thing that triggers me is the word 'casual'.What do you mean you are having casual sex with someone so no feelings have to be involved nd after that you head on different ways?

Situatioships should not even exist,just using each other for pleasure something that doesn't last forever only for a few seconds and if you are lucky enough three minutes of feeling good and that's it.Why do threesomes exist?For fun huh?The normalization in this needs to be studied.And people not only do it once but several times?When two people are in a relationship and they have no sex then the relationship is considered boring and one partner ends up breaking things with the other.

Yearning does not exist nowadays and if it does only few people possess it.Intimacy in relationships doesn't exist anymore.Unfortunately today's society has unintentionally stripped offthe meaning of sex which is quite sad .People don't yearn anymore like we are in a shortage of yearners right now.Why can't there be the love we used to read about in novels in the society?People are so afraid of deeply loving because of either they've been broken before or just because of the ego.I do agree that it can be okay to normalise sex in terms of reducing the shame that comes with it,promote sexual health, fight against abuse and protect individuals freedom.Anyway everyone experiences and defines sex differently and no one should be judged for valuingit deeply or choosing not to.

I just wonder—what would our lives look like if we weren’t so afraid to yearn? If love, real intimacy, and slowness weren’t considered.

I wish I'd write more but I just get lazy and write more on my journals but I do have alot to share.

~xx💞